Wifework by Susan Maushart

[samvara]

Nothing has changed; I've no desire to be a wife but am still quite keen to acquire one.

Interesting points to note for me is that men get far more out of marriage than women in terms of health, stability, leisure time, companionship and happiness. They are less prone to mental illness and live longer in married relationships. No wonder women initiate most divorces. I feel like I've known this all my life, it's hardly ground breaking information and yet it's so persistent.

The practice of husbands 'helping' around the house is no more a solution either. Any man who insists that this is good enough should be immediately downgraded to 'helping' with his wife's sex life as well.

Comments

[tiger-75.livejournal.com]

'Helping' with his wife's sex life. That could be amusing

My wifey husband person shampooed all the carpets between 4 different social engagements. I really tried to get him to wear a pinny but he declined. Shame really! ;-)

x

[black-samvara.livejournal.com]

I assume it means he occasionally turns up and does something but for the most part more talented people take care of it.

[grins]

Your wifey husband person is a dear and I love him to bitses.

[creativemeans.livejournal.com]

How should they help? *grin*

Susan M is great! Love hearing her talk. When I was first working in consulting my mum always used to say that I needed a wife to run my stuff, just like my colleagues!

[black-samvara.livejournal.com]

Hrm, if it's anything like the way many men 'cook' he should turn up, wear a funny outfit, make a huge deal about the fact he's doing it, do something extravagant and showy that's a little rich to stomach then not do it again for six months.

We ALL need wives.

[evilmattikinz.livejournal.com]

So, what are we good for nothing male-units supposed to do in life then? And what is it that wife-units really want?

[black-samvara.livejournal.com]

Male-units are good for all sorts of things!

All S.M. is pointing out is that male-units and female-units both wants wives... but usually only the male-unit gets one.

[evilmattikinz.livejournal.com]

Then why get bogged down in the complexities of domestication then? You can get minions for that (of unspecified gender). Then both male-units and female-units can pretend if they want to play at being wife-units and in-trouble-units.

Seriously?

[black-samvara.livejournal.com]

She talks about that too - and apparently it's the first to go in financial troubles, the woman is always the one expected to pick up the slack and is often blamed for being fiscally irresponsible.

Also; that fixes the ironing, cleaning the bathroom and the vacuuming.

It doesn't fix who prepares the meals, who provides the emotional support/intimacy, who looks after the kids/pets, who plans the work¹ or; something I was unaware of; who gets to make the jokes and who gets to laugh at them.

¹Which is one of the major components of wifework and why she sneers at men who 'help out' - they're still disavowing any responsibility, just passively offering to be a part-time minion.

Re: Seriously?

[evilmattikinz.livejournal.com]

Thats all a bit negative, with such a relaxed life with minions to deal with the drudge of day to day living surely both units will be happier and more productive and have vast encompassing careers.

And as for meals, support, kids, work, that'll be the cook, shrink, nanny and head butler. As for jokes, well you can have a live-in clown but that's seen as a bit unsophisticated over here. It might be all the rage in australia for all I know.

I do feel from your tone that this argument is unwinnable from my current gender standpoint. So I am keen to learn what traits, properties and abilities I need to obtain in order to not offend a woman that has read this book. Especially not a hardback copy which can leave scars when thrown! (-;

[black-samvara.livejournal.com]

You'd hope so wouldn't you; pity the stats don't back it up.

I'd rather just have a wife, they're clearly a valuable resource. Although the idea of having a personal jester does have it's charms...

I suspect a male-unit should be very clear on what he wants from a relationship. If he's getting all sorts of 'extra's' like clean socks, reminders to send birthday cards, regular sex when he wants it, hot meals and someone who shows interest in his day, he might want to remember that they aren't 'extra's', they are in fact, significantly improving his quality of life and using up the energy and potential leisure time of another person.

If he doesn't want to reciprocate he should stop using up said resources.

Or you could forge some plate mail armour; with a fast, white horse and enough padding I imagine it won't matter how many hardcovers people own.

Re: Seriously?

[black-samvara.livejournal.com]

Of course if female-units stopped assuming that just because they provide such services they will be reciprocated and actually chose only to date people who did reciprocate this entire argument would be instantly ended.